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Thanksgiving Top 10

My favorite things to do on Thanksgiving…

10. Nothing
9. Nothing
8. Watch TV
7. Watch TV
6. Eat
5. Eat
4. NOT get called on a Mission. (Unless it’s something cool like making sure the Fun House (In The Department of Fun) is still fun. Or taste-testing some of the new Pumpkin-Dazzleberry popsicle pies at the FDA.
3. Lock Benjamin in the garage. Just kidding. ☺
2. Give thanks for all the good stuff.
1. Call Jennifer.

New Favorite Song

"Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon


Can someone please stop my father?

Somehow he got this crazy idea in his head from watching the Food Network that this Thanksgiving, we should have a Turducken! If you don’t know what a Turducken is, check this out from Wikipedia:

"A Turducken is a dish consisting of a partially de-boned turkey stuffed with a de-boned duck, which itself is stuffed with a small de-boned chicken. The thoracic cavity of the chicken and the rest of the gaps are filled with, at the very least, a highly seasoned breadcrumb mixture or sausage meat, although some versions have a different stuffing for each bird."

The result is a relatively solid, albeit layered, piece of poultry, suitable for cooking by braising, roasting, grilling, or barbecuing. The turducken is not suitable for deep frying Cajun style (to deep fry poultry, the body cavity must be hollow to cook evenly).

Some people credit Cajun-creole fusion chef Paul Prudhomme with creating the commercial dish as part of the festival Duvall Days in Duvall, Wa in 1983. However, no one has ever verified this claim.”

If anyone has any ideas for how to intervene in this matter, please send suggstions to asap!

Star Sightings

A few people emailed about my last blog and asked if I had seen anybody famous when I was in Los Angeles. I’m not that impressed by celebrities but I did have three pretty cool “sightings.”

#1: Nice Head: Jay Leno driving in a white convertible antique car through the Hollywood Hills. His head was really gigantic, but that’s how I knew it was him.

#2: Larry King Live: At breakfast at Nate n Al’s in Beverly Hills around 8:30AM. He eats there every day with three of his pals and always gets the “Larry King Matzo Brei” which is actually ON the menu! I was thinking about getting it, but it looked too gross.

#3: Will Farrell, Jonah Hill, etc..: My buddy Mosely got us to a Hollywood party hosted by Ari Emmanuel, who is a big agent and whose the brother of that guy that Obama just hired to run the White House or something. There was also a band and lots of free food. Will Farrell and Jonah Hill from "Superbad" were there, but the guy I was psyched about seeing was the boxing coach from "The Wire," which is my Mom's favorite show of all time. I tried to go up to him and tell him how great I thought it was, but I was afraid to look lame, so I just kept chowing down all the free eats.

Gina Gershon was there, too.

A Wrong Turn?

A lot of people in The Seems don’t believe in wrong turns. In other words, they think that most things that happen were part of The Plan, even if it doesn’t make sense at the time. Then later, it will make sense. But what happened to me last week was really a wrong turn. They were doing construction in the In-Between to widen some of the transport tubes, and on my way back from an All-Fixer meeting, I took the detour signs to my Sector (Highland Park)…but somehow I ended up in Los Angeles!

I knew something wasn’t right when I stepped outside and instead of Cleveland Avenue + Illuminating Experiences I was near this place called Factor’s Deli and it was eighty degrees and sunny. And I knew something was even more not right when I asked somebody where I was and they said “Beverly Hills!”

Anyway, as long as I was there I figured I would stay a couple days because it was so warm, unlike Jersey. I have an old friend there who was a Candidate at the IFR with me but dropped out – a guy by the name of Moseley Siegel. He lives in the Hollywood Hills with his girlfriend Chantelle. Mose got totally rich because he sold this internet project for a ton of $ (that's Another Story), so all we did was hang out out on Mose's pool deck and barbecue and stuff. I ended up staying 5 days(!) and my Me-2 was really pissed cause he had to rake the leaves back at home. Moseley is in the entertainment business now and he kept trying to convince me to go in to the movie studios and pitch the idea of The Seems and the Fixers as a movie, but I said “no way.” It would be kind of cool, but only if someone else does it. Because that would be a major Rule violation on my part, and I’m already on thin ice.

Anyway, I’m back now but it was fun little detour….if there is such a thing.

Fixer's Jukebox

Just wanted to let you guys know the box was up and running with a bunch of new tunes. I'm hoping to put all my Mission Mixes on there, along with a bunch of other stuff, but since it takes awhile to get them online, I'll do my best to upload a few songs a night. And be on the lookout for an episode of "Vanishing Point," the old radio show created by the guys who are writing this book series. I'll be sure to you know when it goes live...

LTF-FTL, and if you have any recommendations for the jukebox, be sure to let me know.


P.S. Just to remind you, if you want to listen to the songs even after you leave, just click on the "Open jukebox in new window" hotspot and you're good to go...

P.P.S. For those of you who've complained about the lack of hip hop or metal on there...I'm doing my best. #1 problem is a lot of my best tunes are not exactly "parent approved," and personally, I don't believe in the Wal-Mart versions of the songs. So each song has to meet either the Dr. and Mrs. Dr. Drane test before it goes up. Patience...

It's Snow Wonder...

Just wanted to let everyone know that I talked to Weather and they confirmed that the snow was, in fact, intentional. What actually happened was that the Snow Patrol – they’re the ones who make sure snow leaves a proper coating and makes everything look pretty in The World – was doing a test run for the Winter. Just so happens they chose my Sector as well as a few surrounding Sectors for the test! (Nice of them to tell me.)
This explains why only the Northeast got hit – because they decided that that would be less suspicious. But still – do they have to do their test earlier every year? Can’t they at least wait till Thanksgiving? And knowing Weather, Christmas will come and it will be sixty degrees!

Anyway, I guess everybody runs their own Department their own way. But long and short of it is, no reason to panic.

Let’s just hope they hold off on the first Blizzard till January! (Or not.) ☺




Already sent home from school. Sweet...

Here's the view outside my window...


Hmmmm. This is very suspicious indeed. I don’t know when and where you are, but where I am it’s October 27th and it’s snowing! This is very curious because I just watched the weather last night and they called for partly sunny skies and upper 40 degree (Fahrenheit) temperatures!

This is exactly the kind of thing that most people think is just weird, my 7th Sense is going crazy…which probably means something is up in The Seems. I don’t know if this is another Tide attack, just The Department of Weather getting a little impatient for Winter, or the Snow Men up in arms again over their labor dispute. Whatever the case may be, I wasn’t ready for this – and I don’t think a lot of people are. Come to think of it, maybe I’ll put in a call to Weatherman #1, who is an old friend, and make sure everything is ok.

I’ll get back to you.


Fixer's Lounge

Just wanted to give you all the head's up that a bunch of new stuff just went up in the Fixer's Lounge. If you know the password, you can check out a bunch of new pictures in the gallery -- my favorite is the German cover for "The Glitch in Sleep" -- and also hear some new tunes on the Fixer's Jukebox. You can even read an excerpt from "Book 3: The Lost Train of Thought," which should be coming out next Fall. There's still more to come, including a crossword puzzle that is for Seems experts only and a jukebox playlist from legendary Highland Park High School DJ Matt Rockman, so keep checking the blog for more updates.

In the meantime, hope you enjoy, and thanks for all the great emails about "The Split Second."